Please help...I don't know what to do..I need to tell my parents..?

I have this fear and anxiety about crying in front of anyone, and it's this extreme sign of weakness to me, but I think anyone else who cries is just human. Ever since I was little, I would either be ignored, told to get over it and grow up, to shut up, or I would be pestered whenever I cried. It's impossible to tell my parents anything. When my dad found out I was going to therapy, he yelled at me, telling me to grow up and deal with it. My mom, on the other hand, got emotional and started pestered me for information about why I was upset, and I felt guilty. She acts like I was doing something to her by being depressed. I refuse to show any emotion to them because of it. I am depressed and extremely suicidal, and I can't get help without them knowing about it. They don't even know I am depressed. I can't bear to tell them the truth and have to deal with their reactions, which would torture me. When my mom recieved a call that I might be cutting myself, she started yelling at me, read my diary, and called me a disturbed, deviant, little whatever. I can barely talk to my therapist, let alone my parents. I don't know what to do. How can I tell my parents?